Curly David Jokes

Jokes #174

2012-03-28T15:03:43Z

Jokes #173

2012-02-15T17:25:32Z

Jokes #171

2012-01-20T15:03:57Z

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This is an adult Joke mailing list,with MOSTLY ADULT MATERIAL .
This is meant for the 18+ audience.
And it is not meant to offend any one!!

Remember I don't write the jokes I just pass them around so we all can
have a few LAUGHS!! If you thought it was a different type of mailing
list or if you are easily offended by my jokes, then please unsubscribe!!
======================================================================
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MEET NEW FRIENDS & SEX PARTNERS!
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MEET NEW FRIENDS & SEX PARTNERS!
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======================================================================

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======================================================================
Valentine's Day Is Cumming!
Find The Perfect Gift!
http://www.curlystore.com/gifts.html

<a href="http://www.curlystore.com/gifts.html">
Valentine's Day Is Cumming!
Find The Perfect Gift!</a>
======================================================================
Conficious say...Man with athletic fingers-makes broad jump!
======================================================================
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
======================================================================
There's these three guys, best friends since childhood... One of
them is dating an absolutely stunning babe, and is always bragging to
his buddies about the sex they have. Then one day, for who knows what
reason, the guy decides that he's getting tired of the lovely lady, he
needs some new thrills in his life, and pulls a complete 180, declaring he's gay.
"Damn," his friends say, "you know that you're probably going to get AIDS and die!"
Hey, I'll take my chances," he says. "I just needed some kind of
change, and wow, did I find it!"
Well, to make a long story short, in a couple years he indeed
contracts AIDS, and is told he only has a few months left. As he's
lying on his death-bed, he calls his old friends together one last time.
"Guys," he gasps, "you've got to promise me one last thing."
"Sure," say his mates. "What can we do for you?"
"When I'm dead and buried, will you make sure I have the nicest
tombstone you can find?" he asks. "And will you make sure something's
written on it that everyone will remember me for?"
They promise him, and with one final gasp dies... But remembering
their promise, his friends found a beautiful granite stone, and had it
engraved:

Ashes To Ashes,
Dust To Dust,
If You'd Stuck To Pussy,
You'd Still Be With Us.
======================================================================
Three guys are in a bar discussing how much their wives bitch at them.
They decide that when they get home, they'll do everything that the women ask.
The next weekend, they are in the same bar.

The first guy says "Man, I don't think that our idea was so great! I
was sitting on the couch watching tv, and I dropped my cigarette on the
couch. My wife said why don't you burn the whole house down? That
place is still smoldering."

The second guy said "That ain't nothing. I was working on the car,
and dropped my wrench and it nicked the fender. She said why don't you
tear the whole car apart? It took me all night."

The third guy said "You guys don't have nothing on me. When I walked in
the door, my wife was doing the dishes, and I felt a little romantic.
I reached down, and grabbed her crotch, she said "Cut that out!"
Ever seen one of these real close?
======================================================================
Why do Jewish women like circumsized men best?
Because Jewish women like 10% off ANYTHING!!
======================================================================
FOOTBALL MOVES IN SEX

Hike = Up the rear
Reverse = 69
Sack = Girl takes control and gets frisky 2pt.
conversion = multiple orgasms
Prevent Defense = Condom/protection
Face Mask = guy pulls girl head down to blow him
Shotgun = Touchdown in a car
Two minute warning = Guy gives the girl a warning before he blows his load.
Holding = Cuddling
Superbowl = Wedding or Prom night
Huddle = Multiple participants
Instant replay = When you tape the two of you having sex
Masturbation = Illegal use of the hands
Ball Hog = Slut
Onside Kick = Making up after a fight
Double Header = Two mates in the same night
Tight End = Virgin
Wide Receiver = Girl that's loose
False Start = Guy/Girl gets shut down (denied)
Fumble = cheating (problem in the relationship)
Putting it through the uprights = self explanatory
Special Teams = Prostitute/Gigolo
Unsportsmanlike Conduct = Bragging to your friends about your activities
Double Coverage = Two condoms
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Lick Me
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Star Studded
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Nice View
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Amateur BJ
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Cock Ring
http://www.curlydavid.com/cori02.html

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Amateur 69
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/am69.html">Amateur 69</a>
======================================================================

Valentine's Day Is Cumming!
Find The Perfect Gift!
http://www.curlystore.com/gifts.html

<a href="http://www.curlystore.com/gifts.html">
Valentine's Day Is Cumming!
Find The Perfect Gift!</a>

======================================================================
Curly's Exhibitionist Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html">Curly's Exhibitionist Of
The Day!</a>
======================================================================
Curly's Object Of The Day!
Check it out everyday and try to guess the Next Object Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html

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Daily Ding Dong
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Snatch Of The Day!
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SEND IN YOUR PICS TO BE THE "DAILY DING DONG" OR "SNATCH OF THE DAY"!
======================================================================
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Surfer's Corner!

Curly Fans
http://www.curlydavid.com/cfan587.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/cfan587.html">Curly Fans</a>
======================================================================
Rear View
http://www.curlydavid.com/revi110507.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/revi110507.html">Rear View</a>
======================================================================
Nice Rack
http://www.curlydavid.com/nira1104.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/nira1104.html">Nice Rack</a>
======================================================================
Curly Fans
http://www.curlydavid.com/cfan586.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/cfan586.html">Curly Fans</a>
======================================================================
Amateur BJ
http://www.curlydavid.com/ambj227.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/ambj227.html">Amateur BJ</a>
======================================================================
Valentine's Day Is Cumming!
Find The Perfect Gift!
http://www.curlystore.com/gifts.html

<a href="http://www.curlystore.com/gifts.html">
Valentine's Day Is Cumming!
Find The Perfect Gift!</a>
======================================================================
Blonde Moments!

Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over 90 mph.
"Hey..." asked the brunette at the wheel ,"Any cops following us?"
The blonde turned around and had a long look at the road behind them.
"Yeah.......looks like it..."
"Are his flashers on?"
The blonde turned around again......
"Yup....nope....yup....nope....yup....nope....yup....."
======================================================================
What is the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?
You can only get three fingers in a bowling ball.
======================================================================
Curly's Classic Joke Of The Day!

A little girl is walking along in the park when she comes across 3
little dogs sitting there she bends down to stroke the first dog and
says "How are you today little doggy"
To her utmost surprise the dog answers "I am very happy and contented,
and have been going in and out of puddles all day" The girl then turns to
the second dog and says " How are you today little doggy" The dog answers "
I am very happy and contented, and have been going in and out of puddles all day"
The girl then turns to the third dog and say "Little doggy you don't
look as happy and contented as the other two, why would this be" At
this the third dog answers "because my name is Puddles"
======================================================================
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======================================================================
Surfer's Corner!

Hot Vibe
http://www.curlydavid.com/hovi0601.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/hovi0601.html">Hot Vibe</a>
======================================================================
Up Close
http://www.curlydavid.com/upcl0601.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/upcl0601.html">Up Close</a>
======================================================================
Hot Fling
http://www.curlydavid.com/fling.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/fling.html">Hot Fling</a>
======================================================================
Curly Fan
http://www.curlydavid.com/cfan472.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/cfan472.html">Curly Fan</a>
======================================================================
Curly Fan
http://www.curlydavid.com/cfan473.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/cfan473.html">Curly Fan</a>
======================================================================
Need A Vibrator?
http://www.vibratorwarehouse.com/?idev_id=101

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======================================================================
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NEW VIDEOS ADDED DAILY!
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======================================================================
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HELP CURLYDAVID.COM STAY ALIVE IN THESE CHALLENGING TIMES!
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HELP CURLY AND SUPPORT ONE OF HIS SPONSORS!</a>
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WANT MORE PICS VIST MY SITE!
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Remember - I don't write 'em ! And don't be offended, they're just JOKES!
Well that's all folks, keep on laughing!
Hope you all have a great day.
If you have any comments, jokes or suggestions please feel free to
email me at curlydavid@yahoo.com.
Please pass the word on to all of your friends to join CurlyDavid's
mailing list, where you get free jokes and more!.
To send in jokes curlydavid@yahoo.com
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Jokes #167 Merry Christmas

2011-12-25T15:42:53Z

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If you no longer wish to receive these mailings, then please click
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This is an adult Joke mailing list,with MOSTLY ADULT MATERIAL .
This is meant for the 18+ audience.
And it is not meant to offend any one!!

Remember I don't write the jokes I just pass them around so we all can
have a few LAUGHS!! If you thought it was a different type of mailing
list or if you are easily offended by my jokes, then please unsubscribe!!
======================================================================
Just a reminder if you missed a mailer or any updates then go directly
to my site and GET EVERYTHING THERE!!!
ALL NEW EVERYDAY!

ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

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Happy Holidays!
======================================================================
The four stages of life:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
======================================================================
A Christmas Card from Santa

I write this letter to tell you,
High taxes have taken away,
The things I really cherish:
My workshop, my reindeer, my sleigh.

I'm forced to ride a donkey,
Who's old and crippled and slow.
So, if I don't see you at Christmas time,
I'm out on my ass in the snow.

Santa
======================================================================
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html">
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE</a>
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook curlydavid

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!
Posting jokes all week long!
Search me on facebook curlydavid

======================================================================
A beautiful innocent young girl wants to meet Santa Claus
so she puts on a robe and stays up late on Christmas Eve. Santa
arrives, climbs down the chimney, and begins filling the socks. He
is about to leave when the girl says in a sexy voice, "Oh Santa,
please stay."

Santa replies, "HO HO HO, Gotta go, gotta go,
Gotta get the presents to the children, you know."

The girl drops the robe to reveal a sexy bra and panties and says
in an even sexier voice, "Oh Santa, please stay."

Santa replies, "HO HO HO, Gotta go, Gotta go,
Gotta get the presents to the children, you know."
Santa begins to sweat.

The girl takes off her bra and says, "Oh Santa... Please... Stay."

Santa replies, "HO HO HO, Gotta go,
Gotta go, gotta get the resents to the children, you know."
Santa wipes his brow.

She loses the panties and says, "Oh Santa... Please... Stay....."

Santa, with sweat pouring off his brow says,
"HEY HEY HEY, Gottastay, Gotta stay,
Can't get up the chimney with my pecker this way !!!
======================================================================
The very snobbish wife was discussing the subject of Christmas presents
with her maid.

"Now what about the butler?" the rich woman said.

"A set of wine glasses?" the maid suggested.

The woman frowned icily. "He doesn't really need that. A butler never
entertains. He'll get a tie."

The maid grimaced, but said only, "What about a dress for Jenny, the
serving girl?"

The woman frowned again. "She doesn't really need a new dress. She'll
only get in trouble. We'll get her another apron."

The conversation continued in the same vein, and the maid was chafing
At her employer's arrogance when they reached her husband.

"I assume you want to get him something he really needs, madam?" the
maid replied.

"Of course," the woman replied.

"Then what about three more inches?", said the maid.
======================================================================
HELP CURLY AND SUPPORT ONE OF HIS SPONSORS!
TREAT YOURSELF TO A NEW DVD, SEX TOY,GENERIC VIAGRA,HOT LOTIONS,
OR MAYBE JOIN ONE OF THE MANY DATING SITES ON CURLYDAVID.COM OR JOIN ONE
OF THE ADULT SITES THAT SPONSOR CURLYDAVID.COM. ANY PURCHASE WILL
HELP CURLYDAVID.COM STAY ALIVE IN THESE CHALLENGING TIMES!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">
HELP CURLY AND SUPPORT ONE OF HIS SPONSORS!</a>
======================================================================
Why a Christmas tree is better than a man!

1. A Christmas tree is always erect.
2. Even small ones give satisfaction.
3. A Christmas tree stays up for 12 days and nights.
4. A Christmas tree always looks good even with the lights on.
5. A Christmas tree is always happy with its size.
6. A Christmas tree has cute balls.
7. A Christmas tree doesn't get mad if you break one of its balls.
8. You can throw a Christmas tree out when it's past its 'sell by'date.
9. You don't have to put up with a Christmas tree all year.
======================================================================
Why Santa can't possibly be a man:

a. Men can't pack a bag
b. Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet.
c. Men would feel their masculinity is threatened... having to be seen
with all those elves
d. Men don't answer their mail
e. Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described even in
just as anything remotely resembling a "bowl full of jelly"
f. Men aren't interested in stockings unless somebody's wearing them
g. Having to do the Ho-Ho-Ho thing would seriously inhibit their
ability to pick up women
h. Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.
======================================================================
A little boy sits on Santa's lap. Santa says "I bet I know
what you want for Christmas," and with his finger he taps the
boys nose with every letter he spells "T-O-Y-S".

The little boy thinks a second and says, "No, I have enough toys."

Santa replies once again tapping the boys nose with every
letter, "C-A-N-D-Y."

Again the little boy thinks a second and says, "No, I have
all kinds of candy."

"Well what would you like for Christmas?" Santa asks.

The little boy replies, tapping Santa on the nose,
"P-U-S-S-Y, and don't tell me you don't have any because I
can smell it on your finger!"
======================================================================
Roses are Redish, Violets are Bluesh.
If it wasn't for Christmas, we'd all be Jewish.
======================================================================
Top Ten Signs you've Hired a Bad Department Store Santa !

10. He recently starred in film called The Full Santy.
9.Asks all the mothers, "How 'bout a little lap action for mommy?"
8.Was recently suspended from NBA for choking his coach.
7.Beard catches on fire whenever he lights his crack pipe.
6.Every few minutes, his beard rustles, and you hear a muffled meow.
5.When kid asks for a bike, he says, "Good luck -- your parents look
like cheap-ass bastards."
4.He's doubled over, gasping for breath, after the second "Ho."
3.Amuses kids by demonstrating the "sleeper hold" on an elf.
2.His "beard" consists of a dozen styrofoam peanuts glued to his face.
1.Always starts off by asking, "You ain't Jewish, are ya?"
======================================================================
Top 10 Santa Pick-Up Lines

10. Hey Babe, when was the last time you did it in a sleigh?
9. Wanna see my 12-inch elf?
8. I`ve got something special in the sack for you!
7. Ever make it with a fat guy with a whip?
6. I know when you've been bad or good--so let's skip the small talk,
sister!
5. Some of my best toys run on batteries...
4. Interested in seeing the "North Pole"? (Well, that's what the
Mrs. calls it ...)
3. I see you when you`re sleeping and you don`t wear any underwear,
do you?
2. Screw the "nice" list I`ve got you on my "naughty" list!
1. Wanna join the "Mile High" club?
======================================================================
Top 10 Signs Santa Doesn't Like Your Kid

10. Kid's letter to north pole comes back stamped, "Dream on, Chester!"

9. Kid asks for new bike, gets pack of smokes.

8. Along with presents, Santa leaves hefty bill for shipping and
handling.

7. By the time he gets to your house, all he has left are styrofoam
peanuts.

6. Christmas day, your kid wakes up with a Reindeer head in his bed.

5. Instead of "Naughty" or "Nice", Santa has him on the dork list.

4. Sends him off on one of them Carnival Cruises with Kathie Lee.

3. First words when kid gets on his lap are, "Touch my beard
and I'll put the hurt on you."

2. Labels on all your kid's toys read "Straight from Craptown."

1. Four words: "Off my lap, Tubby!"
======================================================================
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html">
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE</a>
======================================================================
THIS IS A MUST SEE!
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LAST LONGER PERFORM BETTER!
SATISFY YOUR LOVER!
CLICK HERE TO BUY GENERIC VIAGRA & CIALIS!
http://www.generic-pharmacy.net/?affid=7196

<a href="http://www.generic-pharmacy.net/?affid=7196">
CLICK HERE TO BUY GENERIC VIAGRA & CIALIS</a>
======================================================================
Curly's Exhibitionist Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html">Curly's Exhibitionist Of
The Day!</a>
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook Curly David

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
Curly's Object Of The Day!
Check it out everyday and try to guess the Next Object Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html">Curly's Object Of The Day</a>
======================================================================
ALL OF THE DAILY LINKS ARE NOW ON ONE PAGE!!

Babe,Stud,Hunk,Biker Babe,Oral Reports & ALL OF THE REST...
CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!
http://www.curlydavid.com/dailysp.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/dailysp.html">CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!</a>
======================================================================
Daily Ding Dong
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/ddong.html">Daily Ding Dong</a>

Snatch Of The Day!
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======================================================================
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Surfer's Corner!

Santa's Baby
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/saba122408.html">Santa's Baby</a>
===================

Nutcracker
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/nu122408.html">Nutcracker</a>
===================

HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html">
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======================================================================

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======================================================================
Blonde Moments!

What did the post card say from the blonde?
Having a good time. Where am I?

Did 'ya hear about the blonde who..............
Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.

======================================================================

Curly's Classic Joke Of The Day!

Peter was in bed with his best friend's wife. Just as things were
reaching a climax, he suddenly stopped and sat on the edge of the bed,
holding his head in his hands.

"What the hell's wrong with you?" his partner asked.

"I feel just like a regular son-of-a-bitch, getting some of my best
friend's pussy," the man moaned.

"Well," she soothed, patting his back, "you can stop worrying. You're
not getting his pussy. His pussy is five inches deeper."

======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook Curly David

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html">
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE</a>
======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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Older and bolder ladies who will show true elder erotica phone sex
play.
1-888-786-5337
======================================================================
Remember - I don't write 'em ! And don't be offended, they're just JOKES!
Well that's all folks, keep on laughing!
Hope you all have a great day.
If you have any comments, jokes or suggestions please feel free to
email me at curlydavid@yahoo.com.
Please pass the word on to all of your friends to join CurlyDavid's
mailing list, where you get free jokes and more!.
To send in jokes curlydavid@yahoo.com
========================================================================
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Jokes #167 Merry Christmas

2011-12-25T08:23:33Z

This is an OPT-IN Mailing List.

If you no longer wish to receive these mailings, then please click
on the unsubscribe link at the bottom of this email.
=======================================================================
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com">CurlyDavid Jokes</a>

This is an adult Joke mailing list,with MOSTLY ADULT MATERIAL .
This is meant for the 18+ audience.
And it is not meant to offend any one!!

Remember I don't write the jokes I just pass them around so we all can
have a few LAUGHS!! If you thought it was a different type of mailing
list or if you are easily offended by my jokes, then please unsubscribe!!
======================================================================
Just a reminder if you missed a mailer or any updates then go directly
to my site and GET EVERYTHING THERE!!!
ALL NEW EVERYDAY!

ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!</A>
======================================================================
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======================================================================

ON SALE!

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<a href="http://www.topills.com/generic-packs.html?affid=7196">Happy Variety Mix</a>

======================================================================
Happy Holidays!
======================================================================
The four stages of life:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
======================================================================
A Christmas Card from Santa

I write this letter to tell you,
High taxes have taken away,
The things I really cherish:
My workshop, my reindeer, my sleigh.

I'm forced to ride a donkey,
Who's old and crippled and slow.
So, if I don't see you at Christmas time,
I'm out on my ass in the snow.

Santa
======================================================================
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html">
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE</a>
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook curlydavid

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!
Posting jokes all week long!
Search me on facebook curlydavid

======================================================================
A beautiful innocent young girl wants to meet Santa Claus
so she puts on a robe and stays up late on Christmas Eve. Santa
arrives, climbs down the chimney, and begins filling the socks. He
is about to leave when the girl says in a sexy voice, "Oh Santa,
please stay."

Santa replies, "HO HO HO, Gotta go, gotta go,
Gotta get the presents to the children, you know."

The girl drops the robe to reveal a sexy bra and panties and says
in an even sexier voice, "Oh Santa, please stay."

Santa replies, "HO HO HO, Gotta go, Gotta go,
Gotta get the presents to the children, you know."
Santa begins to sweat.

The girl takes off her bra and says, "Oh Santa... Please... Stay."

Santa replies, "HO HO HO, Gotta go,
Gotta go, gotta get the resents to the children, you know."
Santa wipes his brow.

She loses the panties and says, "Oh Santa... Please... Stay....."

Santa, with sweat pouring off his brow says,
"HEY HEY HEY, Gottastay, Gotta stay,
Can't get up the chimney with my pecker this way !!!
======================================================================
The very snobbish wife was discussing the subject of Christmas presents
with her maid.

"Now what about the butler?" the rich woman said.

"A set of wine glasses?" the maid suggested.

The woman frowned icily. "He doesn't really need that. A butler never
entertains. He'll get a tie."

The maid grimaced, but said only, "What about a dress for Jenny, the
serving girl?"

The woman frowned again. "She doesn't really need a new dress. She'll
only get in trouble. We'll get her another apron."

The conversation continued in the same vein, and the maid was chafing
At her employer's arrogance when they reached her husband.

"I assume you want to get him something he really needs, madam?" the
maid replied.

"Of course," the woman replied.

"Then what about three more inches?", said the maid.
======================================================================
HELP CURLY AND SUPPORT ONE OF HIS SPONSORS!
TREAT YOURSELF TO A NEW DVD, SEX TOY,GENERIC VIAGRA,HOT LOTIONS,
OR MAYBE JOIN ONE OF THE MANY DATING SITES ON CURLYDAVID.COM OR JOIN ONE
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======================================================================
Why a Christmas tree is better than a man!

1. A Christmas tree is always erect.
2. Even small ones give satisfaction.
3. A Christmas tree stays up for 12 days and nights.
4. A Christmas tree always looks good - even with the lights on.
5. A Christmas tree is always happy with its size.
6. A Christmas tree has cute balls.
7. A Christmas tree doesn't get mad if you break one of its balls.
8. You can throw a Christmas tree out when it's past its 'sell by'
date.
9. You don't have to put up with a Christmas tree all year.
======================================================================
Why Santa can't possibly be a man:

a. Men can't pack a bag
b. Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet.
c. Men would feel their masculinity is threatened... having to be seen
with all those elves
d. Men don't answer their mail
e. Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described even in
just as anything remotely resembling a "bowl full of jelly"
f. Men aren't interested in stockings unless somebody's wearing them
g. Having to do the Ho-Ho-Ho thing would seriously inhibit their
ability to pick up women
h. Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.
======================================================================
A little boy sits on Santa's lap. Santa says "I bet I know
what you want for Christmas," and with his finger he taps the
boys nose with every letter he spells "T-O-Y-S".

The little boy thinks a second and says, "No, I have enough toys."

Santa replies once again tapping the boys nose with every
letter, "C-A-N-D-Y."

Again the little boy thinks a second and says, "No, I have
all kinds of candy."

"Well what would you like for Christmas?" Santa asks.

The little boy replies, tapping Santa on the nose,
"P-U-S-S-Y, and don't tell me you don't have any because I
can smell it on your finger!"
======================================================================
Roses are Redish, Violets are Bluesh.
If it wasn't for Christmas, we'd all be Jewish.
======================================================================
Top Ten Signs you've Hired a Bad Department Store Santa !

10. He recently starred in film called The Full Santy.
9.Asks all the mothers, "How 'bout a little lap action for mommy?"
8.Was recently suspended from NBA for choking his coach.
7.Beard catches on fire whenever he lights his crack pipe.
6.Every few minutes, his beard rustles, and you hear a muffled meow.
5.When kid asks for a bike, he says, "Good luck -- your parents look
like cheap-ass bastards."
4.He's doubled over, gasping for breath, after the second "Ho."
3.Amuses kids by demonstrating the "sleeper hold" on an elf.
2.His "beard" consists of a dozen styrofoam peanuts glued to his face.
1.Always starts off by asking, "You ain't Jewish, are ya?"
======================================================================
Top 10 Santa Pick-Up Lines

10. Hey Babe, when was the last time you did it in a sleigh?
9. Wanna see my 12-inch elf?
8. I`ve got something special in the sack for you!
7. Ever make it with a fat guy with a whip?
6. I know when you've been bad or good--so let's skip the small talk,
sister!
5. Some of my best toys run on batteries...
4. Interested in seeing the "North Pole"? (Well, that's what the
Mrs. calls it ...)
3. I see you when you`re sleeping and you don`t wear any underwear,
do you?
2. Screw the "nice" list I`ve got you on my "naughty" list!
1. Wanna join the "Mile High" club?
======================================================================
Top 10 Signs Santa Doesn't Like Your Kid

10. Kid's letter to north pole comes back stamped, "Dream on, Chester!"

9. Kid asks for new bike, gets pack of smokes.

8. Along with presents, Santa leaves hefty bill for shipping and
handling.

7. By the time he gets to your house, all he has left are styrofoam
peanuts.

6. Christmas day, your kid wakes up with a Reindeer head in his bed.

5. Instead of "Naughty" or "Nice", Santa has him on the dork list.

4. Sends him off on one of them Carnival Cruises with Kathie Lee.

3. First words when kid gets on his lap are, "Touch my beard
and I'll put the hurt on you."

2. Labels on all your kid's toys read "Straight from Craptown."

1. Four words: "Off my lap, Tubby!"
======================================================================
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html">
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE</a>
======================================================================
THIS IS A MUST SEE!
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<a href="http://www.generic-pharmacy.net/?affid=7196">
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======================================================================
Curly's Exhibitionist Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html">Curly's Exhibitionist Of
The Day!</a>
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook Curly David

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
Curly's Object Of The Day!
Check it out everyday and try to guess the Next Object Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html">Curly's Object Of The Day</a>
======================================================================
ALL OF THE DAILY LINKS ARE NOW ON ONE PAGE!!

Babe,Stud,Hunk,Biker Babe,Oral Reports & ALL OF THE REST...
CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!
http://www.curlydavid.com/dailysp.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/dailysp.html">CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!</a>
======================================================================
Daily Ding Dong
http://www.curlydavid.com/ddong.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/ddong.html">Daily Ding Dong</a>

Snatch Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/snatch.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/snatch.html">Snatch Of The Day!</a>

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======================================================================
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======================================================================
Surfer's Corner!

Santa's Baby
http://www.curlydavid.com/saba122408.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/saba122408.html">Santa's Baby</a>
===================

Nutcracker
http://www.curlydavid.com/nu122408.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/nu122408.html">Nutcracker</a>
===================

HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html">
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE</a>

======================================================================

ON SALE!

Vibrators under $20
http://www.curlystore.com/special.html?id=11763

Nipple Stimulators
http://www.curlystore.com/toys_category.html?id=11118

DVD"S UNDER $5.00
A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlystore.com/dvds_under5.html

Anal Toys
http://www.curlystore.com/toys_category.html?id=1397
<a href="http://www.curlystore.com/toys_category.html?id=1397">Anal Toys</a>

Massage TOYS
http://www.curlystore.com/toys_category.html?id=6380
<a href="http://www.curlystore.com/toys_category.html?id=6380">Massage TOYS</a>

======================================================================
Blonde Moments!

What did the post card say from the blonde?
Having a good time. Where am I?

Did 'ya hear about the blonde who..............
Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.

======================================================================

Curly's Classic Joke Of The Day!

Peter was in bed with his best friend's wife. Just as things were
reaching a climax, he suddenly stopped and sat on the edge of the bed,
holding his head in his hands.

"What the hell's wrong with you?" his partner asked.

"I feel just like a regular son-of-a-bitch, getting some of my best
friend's pussy," the man moaned.

"Well," she soothed, patting his back, "you can stop worrying. You're
not getting his pussy. His pussy is five inches deeper."

======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook Curly David

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/xmas10.html">
HERE IS THE COMPLETE LIST OF XMAS PICS A MUST SEE</a>
======================================================================
Need A Vibrator?
http://www.vibratorwarehouse.com/?idev_id=101

<a href="http://www.vibratorwarehouse.com/?idev_id=101">Need A Vibrator</a>
======================================================================
THIS IS A MUST SEE!
LOWEST PRICES ON THE INTERNET!

LAST LONGER PERFORM BETTER!
SATISFY YOUR LOVER!
CLICK HERE TO BUY GENERIC VIAGRA & CIALIS!
http://www.generic-pharmacy.net/?affid=7196

<a href="http://www.generic-pharmacy.net/?affid=7196">
CLICK HERE TO BUY GENERIC VIAGRA & CIALIS</a>
======================================================================
WANT MORE PICS VIST MY SITE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">WANT MORE PICS VIST MY
SITE!</a>
======================================================================
1-888-786-5337-Call the Nice Older Lady of Your Dreams-1-888-786-5337
Call now for LIVE sensual, erotic phone fantasy action with the sexy
older lady of your dreams.
Experienced women in their 40's, 50's, 60's and ABOVE are ready to give

the mature fantasy you've always wanted.
Older and bolder ladies who will show true elder erotica phone sex
play.
1-888-786-5337
======================================================================
Remember - I don't write 'em ! And don't be offended, they're just JOKES!
Well that's all folks, keep on laughing!
Hope you all have a great day.
If you have any comments, jokes or suggestions please feel free to
email me at curlydavid@yahoo.com.
Please pass the word on to all of your friends to join CurlyDavid's
mailing list, where you get free jokes and more!.
To send in jokes curlydavid@yahoo.com
========================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list">
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
=====================================================================
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If you experience any difficulty whatsoever with any of the above
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subject UNSUBSCRIBE

Jokes #166

2011-12-01T12:37:10Z

This is an OPT-IN Mailing List.

If you no longer wish to receive these mailings, then please click
on the unsubscribe link at the bottom of this email.
=======================================================================
CurlyDavid Jokes - http://www.curlydavid.com
<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com">CurlyDavid Jokes</a>

This is an adult Joke mailing list,with MOSTLY ADULT MATERIAL .
This is meant for the 18+ audience.
And it is not meant to offend any one!!

Remember I don't write the jokes I just pass them around so we all can
have a few LAUGHS!! If you thought it was a different type of mailing
list or if you are easily offended by my jokes, then please unsubscribe!!
======================================================================
Just a reminder if you missed a mailer or any updates then go directly
to my site and GET EVERYTHING THERE!!!
ALL NEW EVERYDAY!

ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!</A>
======================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
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SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
======================================================================

ON SALE!

Happy Variety Mix
If you can't decide which ED pill is good for you!
Checkout this value pack on sale now!
http://www.topills.com/generic-packs.html?affid=7196

<a href="http://www.topills.com/generic-packs.html?affid=7196">Happy Variety Mix</a>

======================================================================
Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.
======================================================================
The meaning of lots of phrases depend on your location.

A "Safe Cracker" in New York is a person who opens a victim's safe without
knowing the combination; ......in Georgia it's an AIDS-free girl on the pill.
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook curlydavid

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!
Posting jokes all week long!
Search me on facebook curlydavid

======================================================================
An important executive was telling friends at his country club
about some of his life experiences:
"So I bought this yacht that could carry fifty people and I took
it out for a maiden voyage and it hit a reef and sunk."

"Then I bought an airplane and on the first flight it hit another
plane on the field and burned up."

"Then I married this beautiful blonde and no sooner did I get home
than I found her fooling around with the chauffeur and I had to
divorce her."

"So what's the moral?" one of the others asked.

"Clear as a bell," said the old man. "If it swims, flies, or f*cks,
...lease it, ...don't buy it."
======================================================================
Confucious Say.....

It takes many nails to build a crib but one screw to fill it.
Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
Man who sit on tack, get point.
Man with hand on tool not always mechanic.
Man who lives in glass house should change in basement.
He who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.
======================================================================
What is the definition of a smart ass?
Someone who can sit on an ice cream cone and tell you what flavor it is.
======================================================================
Why do men love blowjobs so much?
They love all jobs they can lay back and watch a woman do.
======================================================================
HELP CURLY AND SUPPORT ONE OF HIS SPONSORS!
TREAT YOURSELF TO A NEW DVD, SEX TOY,GENERIC VIAGRA,HOT LOTIONS,
OR MAYBE JOIN ONE OF THE MANY DATING SITES ON CURLYDAVID.COM OR JOIN ONE
OF THE ADULT SITES THAT SPONSOR CURLYDAVID.COM. ANY PURCHASE WILL
HELP CURLYDAVID.COM STAY ALIVE IN THESE CHALLENGING TIMES!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">
HELP CURLY AND SUPPORT ONE OF HIS SPONSORS!</a>
======================================================================
What's the difference between people who pray in church and those
who pray in casinos?
The ones in the casinos are serious.
======================================================================
You're trapped in a room with a tiger, a rattlesnake and a lawyer.
You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?
Shoot the lawyer... TWICE!
======================================================================
Why are lawyers buried 12 feet underground instead of the usual six feet?
Because deep down, they are really good people.
======================================================================
An eighty-three year old lady finished her annual physical
examination whereupon the doctor said "You are in fine shape for your
age.. but tell me.. do you still have intercourse?"

"Just a minute .. I'll have to ask my husband," she said. She went
out to the reception room and said:

"Jake do we still have intercourse?"

Jake answered impatiently........"If I told you once I told you a
thousand times... We have blue cross !!"
======================================================================
What is the difference between a 69 and driving in the fog?
When driving in the fog, you can't see the asshole in front of you
======================================================================
THIS IS A MUST SEE!
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======================================================================
Curly's Exhibitionist Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html">Curly's Exhibitionist Of
The Day!</a>
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook Curly David

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
Curly's Object Of The Day!
Check it out everyday and try to guess the Next Object Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html">Curly's Object Of The Day</a>
======================================================================
ALL OF THE DAILY LINKS ARE NOW ON ONE PAGE!!

Babe,Stud,Hunk,Biker Babe,Oral Reports & ALL OF THE REST...
CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!
http://www.curlydavid.com/dailysp.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/dailysp.html">CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!</a>
======================================================================
Daily Ding Dong
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/ddong.html">Daily Ding Dong</a>

Snatch Of The Day!
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SEND IN YOUR PICS TO BE THE "DAILY DING DONG" OR "SNATCH OF THE DAY"!
======================================================================
PIPEDREAM EXTREME
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HOT MALE SEX TOYS GET ONE NOW!</a>
======================================================================
Surfer's Corner!

Up View
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======================================================================
Try This
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======================================================================
Lick Me
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======================================================================
Curly Fans
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======================================================================
Taste Me
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======================================================================

ON SALE!

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Nipple Stimulators
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DVD"S UNDER $5.00
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Anal Toys
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Massage TOYS
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<a href="http://www.curlystore.com/toys_category.html?id=6380">Massage TOYS</a>

======================================================================
Blonde Moments!

How did the blonde burn her nose?
Bobbing for French fries.

Why can't blondes put in light bulbs?
They keep breaking them with their hammers.
======================================================================
Two blondes stopped in their car to let a funeral pass by.
"Who died?" the first blonde asked.
"I think it was the person in the casket." replied the second blonde.
======================================================================
Curly's Classic Joke Of The Day!

A white man noticed the impressive length of the black man's
penis at the adjacent urinal. "Sure wish I had one like yours."

The black man replied, "You can just tie a string around it and hang a
weight on the end of the string. Put the weight down your pant leg and
you can have one like mine."

The white man thanked him for the suggestion and left.

Some weeks later, they met again in the lavatory.

The black man asked how the project was going.

"Great,I'm half way there!"

"Really?" said the black man.

"Yes. It's turning black!"
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook Curly David

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
Hot SELLING ADULT TOYS

Anal Toys
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Vibrators
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RINGS
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Stripper Poles
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======================================================================
Random Curly Fans!
SEND IN YOUR PICS!

Curly Fans
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======================================================================
Need A Vibrator?
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<a href="http://www.vibratorwarehouse.com/?idev_id=101">Need A Vibrator</a>
======================================================================
Rear View
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Nice Rack
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Smoker
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Firm Member
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
Amateur Screw
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/amsc238.html">Amateur Screw</a>

Amateur Screw
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Hot Squirter
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/hosq321.html">Hot Squirter</a>
======================================================================
COCK SWELLERS!
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Once you have reached your erection peak, you can rely on "Cock Swellers"
to keep you there for longer. 1.25" diameter (stretch to fit)
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COCK SWELLERS!
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======================================================================
Bend Over
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Taste Me
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Nice Rack
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Rear View
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/revi07152.html">Rear View</a>
======================================================================
Get yourself one of these!
Dual density for the ultimate stroking action.
Life-like look and feel.
Heavy duty one piece masturbators with ribbed suction chambers.
Unique design for maximum grip!
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<a href="http://www.curlystore.com/toy.html?id=113116">
Get yourself one of these!
Dual density for the ultimate stroking action.
Life-like look and feel. </a>
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook CurlyDavid

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
WANT MORE PICS VIST MY SITE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">WANT MORE PICS VIST MY
SITE!</a>
======================================================================
1-888-786-5337-Call the Nice Older Lady of Your Dreams-1-888-786-5337
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older lady of your dreams.
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======================================================================
Remember - I don't write 'em ! And don't be offended, they're just JOKES!
Well that's all folks, keep on laughing!
Hope you all have a great day.
If you have any comments, jokes or suggestions please feel free to
email me at curlydavid@yahoo.com.
Please pass the word on to all of your friends to join CurlyDavid's
mailing list, where you get free jokes and more!.
To send in jokes curlydavid@yahoo.com
========================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list">
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
=====================================================================
This mailing is being sent in accordance with the new
CAN-SPAM Act of 2004
If you wish to UNSUBSCRIBE, you can use one of the
following methods:

SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
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SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>

If you experience any difficulty whatsoever with any of the above
unsubscribe links, you can contact me directly to unsubscribe you
manually by either sending an email to:
curlydavid@yahoo.com
subject UNSUBSCRIBE

Gobble Gobble Jokes

2011-11-23T15:33:28Z

This is an OPT-IN Mailing List.

If you no longer wish to receive these mailings, then please click
on the unsubscribe link at the bottom of this email.
=======================================================================
CurlyDavid Jokes - http://www.curlydavid.com
<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com">CurlyDavid Jokes</a>

This is an adult Joke mailing list,with MOSTLY ADULT MATERIAL .
This is meant for the 18+ audience.
And it is not meant to offend any one!!

Remember I don't write the jokes I just pass them around so we all can
have a few LAUGHS!! If you thought it was a different type of mailing
list or if you are easily offended by my jokes, then please unsubscribe!!
======================================================================
Just a reminder if you missed a mailer or any updates then go directly
to my site and GET EVERYTHING THERE!!!
ALL NEW EVERYDAY!

ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!</A>
======================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list">
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
======================================================================

ON SALE!

DAILY HOT DEAL A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlystore.com/daily_deals.html

$2.95 AWESOME DVD SALE
http://www.curlystore.com/special.html?id=11848

THE PERFECT PAIR!
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PACKAGE DEALS!
http://www.curlystore.com/dvds_packages.html

BEST SELLING DVD'S!
http://www.curlystore.com/dvds_bestsellers.html
======================================================================

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO EVERYONE!

ENJOY THIS FREE GIFT!
http://www.curlystore.com/dvd.html?id=62079

<a href="http://www.curlystore.com/dvd.html?id=62079">ENJOY THIS FREE GIFT!</a>

======================================================================
Do you realize if the Pilgrims had first shot a wildcat instead of a
turkey, we'd all be eating pussy for Thanksgiving?
======================================================================
RECIPE FOR TURKEY DRESSING

4 EGGS, BEATEN

7 CUPS POPCORN, UNPOPPED

2 CUPS BREAD CRUMBS

2 CUPS RICE

1 CUP CELERY

1 PACKAGE LIPTON ONION SOUP MIX

MIX ALL INGREDIENTS AND STUFF BIRD. ROAST FOR 3 HOURS IN 350 DEGREE OVEN.
AT THE END OF 3 HOURS, GET THE HELL OUT OF THE KITCHEN BECAUSE THE
POPCORN IS GOING TO BLOW THE ASS OFF THAT BIRD!!!!
=======================================================================
Butterball always has a turkey hot-line that they man every year to
field questions about how to cook a turkey. This one lady called and
asked how long it'd take to roast her bird. The representative asked,
"How much does it weigh?" The lady replied, "I don't know. It's still
running around outside!"
======================================================================
DAILY HOT DEAL A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlystore.com/daily_deals.html

$2.95 AWESOME DVD SALE
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======================================================================
Top 10 Reasons To Buy A Flesh Drive 
http://www.curlystore.com/fleshdrives.html

Holds up to 500 videos in the palm of your hand!

Compact, lightweight and VERY discrete.

Watch it anywhere without leaving a trace.

Great for traveling, no Internet access needed.

Download the videos to own on any computer.

The Flash Drive is yours to KEEP!

Large variety of niches & sizes to choose from.

Eco-Friendly, no more plastic DVD cases!

FleshDrives work on Xbox360, PS3 & TV
(TV must be able to playback WMV)

Professionally filmed, only high quality content!
http://www.curlystore.com/fleshdrives.html
======================================================================
Thanksgiving Trivia...

Ben Franklin wanted the turkey, not the eagle, to be the U.S. national
symbol. He considered the eagle a "bird of bad moral character" because
it lives by being a shrewd thief.

Franklin Roosevelt tried to change the Thanksgiving holiday date to the
next-to-last Thursday in November in order to create a longer Christmas
shopping season, but was forced to move Thanksgiving back to its
original date because of negative public response.

The heaviest turkey ever raised weighed in at 86 lbs, about the size of
a large German Shepherd. It was grown in England.

When Neil Armstrong and Edwin Aldrin sat down to eat their first meal
on the moon, their foil food packets contained roasted turkey and all
of the trimmings.

Turkeys can drown if they look up when it is raining.

Turkeys in fields near the Air Force test areas over which the sound
barrier was broken were known to drop dead from the shock of passing jets.
=======================================================================
Things That Sound Dirty At Thanksgiving But Aren't

"Just spread the legs open and stuff it in."

"How many are coming?"

"Just lay back and take it easy I'll do the rest."

"Are you ready for seconds yet?"

"I didn't expect everyone to come at once!"

"That's the biggest one I've ever seen!"

"Use a nice smooth stroke when you whip it."

"How long will it take after you stick it in?"

"How long do I beat it before it's ready?"

"Are you going to come again next time?"

"It's a little dry. Do you still want to eat it?"

"Just wait your turn. You'll get some!"

"Don't play with your meat!"

"Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?"

"You still have a little bit on your chin."

"You'll know it's ready when it pops up."

"Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!"

"Just reach in and grab the giblets."

"Whew...that's one terrific spread!"

"I am in the mood for a little dark meat."

"Tying the legs together will keep the inside moist."

"Talk about a HUGE breast!"

"And he forces his way into the end zone!"

"She's 5000 pounds fully inflated and it takes 15 men to hold her down."

"It's cool whip time!"

"If I don't unbutton my pants, I am going to burst!"

"It must be broken 'cause when I push on the tip, nothing squirts out."
=====================================================================
What's the difference between mashed potatoes and pussy?
Pussy makes it's own gravy.

How come it takes 6 men to carry a man to his grave
but only one woman to put him there?
=====================================================================
The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about
nothing(and then they marry him).
=====================================================================
I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating
too much, smoking too much, impulse buying, and driving
too fast. Are they kidding? That is my idea of a perfect day.
=====================================================================
You Might Be A Redneck If:
You've ever had Thanksgiving dinner on a Ping-Pong table.
Thanksgiving dinner is squirrel and dumplings.
You've ever re-used a paper plate.
If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Cool Whip on
the side.
If you've ever used your ironing board as a buffet table.
On Thanksgiving Day you have to decide which pet to eat.
Your turkey platter is an old hub cap.
Your best dishes have Dixie printed on them.
Your stuffings secret ingredient comes from the bait shop.
Your only condiment on the dining room table is ketchup.
Side dishes include beef jerky and Moon Pies.
You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.
The directions to your house include "turn off the paved road".
You consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.
You have an Elvis Jell-o mold.
Your secret family recipe is illegal.
You serve Vienna Sausage as an appetizer
======================================================================
'Twas the Night of Thanksgiving

'Twas the night of Thanksgiving, But I just couldn't sleep
I tried counting backwards, I tried counting sheep.
The leftovers beckoned - The dark meat and white
But I fought the temptation With all of my might.

Tossing and turning with anticipation
The thought of a snack became infatuation.
So, I raced to the kitchen, flung open the door
And gazed at the fridge, full of goodies galore.

I gobbled up turkey and buttered potatoes,
Pickles and carrots, beans and tomatoes.
I felt myself swelling so plump and so round,
'Til all of a sudden, I rose off the ground.

I crashed through the ceiling, floating into the sky
With a mouthful of pudding and a handful of pie.
But, I managed to yell as I soared past the trees....
Happy eating to all - Pass the cranberries, please.

May your stuffing be tasty, May your turkey be plump.
May your potatoes 'n gravy Have nary a lump,
May your yams be delicious May your pies take the prize,
May your Thanksgiving dinner Stay off of your thighs.
======================================================================
The most thoroughly wasted of all days is that on which one has not laughed.
======================================================================
THIS IS A MUST SEE!
LOWEST PRICES ON THE INTERNET!

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<a href="http://www.generic-pharmacy.net/?affid=7196">
CLICK HERE TO BUY GENERIC VIAGRA & CIALIS</a>
======================================================================
Curly's Exhibitionist Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html">Curly's Exhibitionist Of
The Day!</a>
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook Curly David

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
Curly's Object Of The Day!
Check it out everyday and try to guess the Next Object Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html">Curly's Object Of The Day</a>
======================================================================
ALL OF THE DAILY LINKS ARE NOW ON ONE PAGE!!

Babe,Stud,Hunk,Biker Babe,Oral Reports & ALL OF THE REST...
CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!</a>
======================================================================
Daily Ding Dong
http://www.curlydavid.com/ddong.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/ddong.html">Daily Ding Dong</a>

Snatch Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/snatch.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/snatch.html">Snatch Of The Day!</a>

SEND IN YOUR PICS TO BE THE "DAILY DING DONG" OR "SNATCH OF THE DAY"!
======================================================================
Surfer's Corner!

Hot Turkey
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<a href="http://curlydavid.com/hotu112908.html">Hot Turkey</a>
======================================================================
Wish Bone
http://curlydavid.com/wibo112908.html

<a href="http://curlydavid.com/wibo112908.html">Wish Bone</a>
=====================================================================
Turkeys
http://www.curlydavid.com/turkey.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/turkey.html">Turkeys</a>
=====================================================================
Turkey F*cker
http://www.curlydavid.com/tf1.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/tf1.html">Turkey F*cker</a>
=====================================================================
Turkey Day
http://www.curlydavid.com/turkeyd.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/turkeyd.html">Turkey Day</a>
=====================================================================
Gobble Gobble
http://www.curlydavid.com/gobble.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/gobble.html">Gobble Gobble</a>
=====================================================================
Turkey Trimming
http://www.curlydavid.com/tutr.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/tutr.html">Turkey Trimming</a>
======================================================================

ON SALE!

DAILY HOT DEAL A MUST SEE!
http://www.curlystore.com/daily_deals.html

Vibrators under $20
http://www.curlystore.com/special.html?id=11763

THE PERFECT PAIR!
http://www.curlystore.com/toys_category.html?id=10369

PACKAGE DEALS!
http://www.curlystore.com/dvds_packages.html

BEST SELLING DVD'S!
http://www.curlystore.com/dvds_bestsellers.html
======================================================================
Blonde Moments!

It was the first time the blonde was eating Thanksgiving dinner
without her family. Trying to re-enact the tradition, she
prepared a dinner for herself. The next day her mother called
to see how everything went.

"Oh, mother, I made myself a lovely dinner, but I had so much
trouble trying to eat the turkey?" said the daughter.

"Did it not taste good?" her mother asked.

"I don't know," the blonde said. "It wouldn't sit still!"
======================================================================
One night a man was getting very drunk in a pub.
He staggered back to take a piss, whipping his prick out as he went in
the door. However, he had wandered into the ladies room by mistake,
surprising a woman sitting on the can.
"This is for ladies!" she screamed!!
The drunk waved his dick at her and said,
"What's the problem? So is this!"
======================================================================
Curly's Classic Joke Of The Day!

Four expectant fathers were in a Minnesota hospital waiting room while
their wives were in labor. The nurse comes in and tells the first man,
"Congratulations, You're the father of twins."
"What a coincidence!" the man exclaims. "I work for the Minnesota Twins
baseball team!"
The nurse returns a short while later and tells the second man, "You
are the father of triplets."
"Wow, what a coincidence!" he replies. "I work for the 3M Corporation."
When the nurse comes again, she tells the third man that his wife has
given birth to quadruplets.
"Another coincidence!" he tells her. "I work for the Four Seasons Hotel!"
At this point, the fourth guy faints. When he comes to, the others ask
him what was wrong.
He moans, "I work for Seven-Eleven!"
======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook Curly David

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
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======================================================================

Friend Me On Facebook!
I POST JOKES ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!

Search me on facebook CurlyDavid

There are 2 curlydavid's my page is the one with my WEBSITE LOGO!
Join The Fun!

======================================================================
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Remember - I don't write 'em ! And don't be offended, they're just JOKES!
Well that's all folks, keep on laughing!
Hope you all have a great day.
If you have any comments, jokes or suggestions please feel free to
email me at curlydavid@yahoo.com.
Please pass the word on to all of your friends to join CurlyDavid's
mailing list, where you get free jokes and more!.
To send in jokes curlydavid@yahoo.com
========================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

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SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
=====================================================================
This mailing is being sent in accordance with the new
CAN-SPAM Act of 2004
If you wish to UNSUBSCRIBE, you can use one of the
following methods:

SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
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SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>

If you experience any difficulty whatsoever with any of the above
unsubscribe links, you can contact me directly to unsubscribe you
manually by either sending an email to:
curlydavid@yahoo.com
subject UNSUBSCRIBE

Curly David's Jokes #155

2011-03-16T23:38:14Z

This is an OPT-IN Mailing List.

If you no longer wish to receive these mailings, then please click
on the unsubscribe link at the bottom of this email.
=======================================================================
CurlyDavid Jokes - http://www.curlydavid.com
<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com">CurlyDavid Jokes</a>

This is an adult Joke mailing list,with MOSTLY ADULT MATERIAL .
This is meant for the 18+ audience.
And it is not meant to offend any one!!

Remember I don't write the jokes I just pass them around so we all can
have a few LAUGHS!! If you thought it was a different type of mailing
list or if you are easily offended by my jokes, then please unsubscribe!!
======================================================================
The mailer will go out 3 times a week!
THE JOKES ARE UPDATED EVERYDAY ON MY SITE!

Just a reminder if you missed a mailer or any updates then go directly
to my site and GET EVERYTHING THERE!!!
ALL NEW EVERYDAY!
http://www.curlydavid.com/joke.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/joke.html">THE DAILY JOKE PAGE</a>

ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!</A>
=======================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list">
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
=======================================================================

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=======================================================================

I had to stop sending out the mailer because aol black listed me and
everytime I sent out the mailer I was getting thousands of bounced emails to
my inbox! It was just getting out of control! I think aol has finally stopped
blocking my mail. This mailer is a test and hopefully I will be able to
continue sending out my jokes and stuff!

I also created a Facebook account called Curly David my account is the one with
my website logo. Please feel free to join me on facebook! On facebook I
post jokes and some funny pics!

======================================================================
BANG Me Silly!!
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======================================================================
If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then
to make sure it's still there.
======================================================================
The Italian says, "When I've a finisheda makina da love with my
girlfriend I go down and gently tickle the back of her knees, she
floats a 6 inches abov'a da bed in ecstasy."

The Frenchman replies, "Zat is nothing, when Ah 'ave finished
making ze lovewith ze girlfriend, Ah kiss all ze way down her body
and zen Ah lick zer soles of her feet wiz mah tongue and she floats 12
inches above ze bed in pure ecstasy."

The Redneck says, "That's nothing buddy. When I've finished doin
it to myolady I get out of bed, walks over to the window and wipes
my dick on the curtains.
She hits the freaking roof!!!"
======================================================================
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg.

The phaonmneel pweor of the hmuan mnid.

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearcr at Cmagbride Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in
waht oredr the ltteers of a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht
the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef,
but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh?

Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpelng was ipmorantt!
======================================================================
Jack goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I'm having trouble getting my
penis erect. Can you help me?"

After a complete examination, the doctor tells Jack, "Well, the problem
with you is that the muscles around the base of your penis are damaged.
There's really nothing I can do for you unless you're willing to try an
experimental treatment."

Jack asks sadly, "What is this treatment?"

"Well," the doctor explains, "what we would do is take the muscles from
the trunk of a baby elephant and implant them in your penis."

Jack thinks about it silently, then says, "Well, the thought of going
through life without ever having sex again is too much, let's go for
it."

A few weeks after the operation Jack was given the green light to use
his improved equipment. He planned a romantic evening for his
girlfriend and took her to one of the nicest restaurants in the city.
In the middle of dinner he felt a stirring between his legs that continued to
the point of being painful. To release the pressure Jack unzipped his fly. His
penis immediately sprung from his pants, went to the top of the table,
grabbed a roll and then returned to his pants.

His girlfriend was stunned at first but then said with a sly smile,
"That was incredible! Can you do it again?"

With his eyes watering, Jack replied, "Well, I guess so, but I don't
think I can fit another roll up my ass."
======================================================================
Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids.

Two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane.

Why do people sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" when they're already there?

Why do people say "tuna fish?" They don't say "beef mammal" or "chicken bird!"
======================================================================
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======================================================================
When your wife asks, "Do I look fat?"
The correct response is, "Do I look stupid?"
======================================================================
A guy went into a bar and met a nice girl. They have a few drinks and
soon wound up at his place, in bed.

They're having a great time. She was on top when suddenly she had an
epileptic seizure she was shaking and foaming at the mouth. Our
uninformed male thought this was incredible best sex he'd ever had. He
finished, but she is still shaking and thrashing about with her
seizure.

He began to get nervous and took her to the emergency room. A nurse
asked what the girl's problem was, and he replied, "Er.... I think her
orgasm is stuck!"
======================================================================
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======================================================================
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Blonde Moments!

A blonde came running up to her husband in the driveway as he came home
from work just jumping for joy. He didn't know why she was jumping for
joy but thought, what the heck, and started jumping up and down with her.

She said, "Honey, I have some really great news for you!"

He said, "Great, tell me what you're so happy about!"

She stopped jumping and was breathing heavily from all the jumping up
and down, when she told him that she was pregnant!

He kissed her and told her, "That's great! I couldn't be happier!"

Then, she said, "Oh, honey, there's more!"

He asked, "What do you mean, 'more?'"

She said, "Well, we are not having just one baby, we are going to have TWINS!"

Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, he asked
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She said, "Well, that was the easy part. I went to Wal-Mart and bought
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======================================================================
Why don't blondes have elevator jobs?
They don't know the route.

What does a blonde do when someone says its chili outside?
She grabs a bowl.
======================================================================
Curly's Classic Joke Of The Day!

Little Johnny came home from school one day confused. His mother was
Jewish and his father was Black. So Johnny asks, "Mommy am I more
Jewish or more Black?"

"What does it really matter? If you want to know for sure you'll just
have to ask your father," his mother tells him.

So, when his father arrived home from work, Little Johnny asks the
same question, " Daddy, am I more Jewish or more Black?"

"What kind of question is that?" Why do you want to know if you're more

Jewish or more Black?", asks dad.

Well, it's like this dad ... Tommy down the street wants to sell his
bicycle for $50, and I don't know whether to talk him down to $25,
or wait until it's dark and steal the thing.
======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================

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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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PLEASE HELP CURLYDAVID AND SUPPORT MY SPONSERS.
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IT HAS BEEN A VERY ROUGH TWO YEARS AND HOPEFULLY THIS YEAR WILL BE BETTER!
PLEASE PASS MY MAILER AND MY WEBSITE TO A FEW OF YOUR FRIENDS!
THANKS,
cURLY
======================================================================
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======================================================================
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http://www.curlydavid.com/wupd.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/wupd.html">LAST WEEKS UPDATES</a>
======================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list">
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
======================================================================
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======================================================================
Remember - I don't write 'em ! And don't be offended, they're just JOKES!
Well that's all folks, keep on laughing!
Hope you all have a great day.
If you have any comments, jokes or suggestions please feel free to
email me at curlydavid@yahoo.com.
Please pass the word on to all of your friends to join CurlyDavid's
mailing list, where you get free jokes and more!.
To send in jokes curlydavid@yahoo.com
========================================================================

Curly David's Jokes #127

2010-05-18T11:59:49Z

This is an OPT-IN Mailing List.

If you no longer wish to receive these mailings, then please click
on the unsubscribe link at the bottom of this email.
=======================================================================
CurlyDavid Jokes - http://www.curlydavid.com
<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com">CurlyDavid Jokes</a>

This is an adult Joke mailing list,with MOSTLY ADULT MATERIAL .
This is meant for the 18+ audience.
And it is not meant to offend any one!!

Remember I don't write the jokes I just pass them around so we all can
have a few LAUGHS!! If you thought it was a different type of mailing
list or if you are easily offended by my jokes, then please unsubscribe!!
======================================================================
The mailer will go out 3 times a week!
THE JOKES ARE UPDATED EVERYDAY ON MY SITE!

Just a reminder if you missed a mailer or any updates then go directly
to my site and GET EVERYTHING THERE!!!
ALL NEW EVERYDAY!
http://www.curlydavid.com/joke.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/joke.html">THE DAILY JOKE PAGE</a>

ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!</A>
=======================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list">
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
=======================================================================

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=======================================================================

AWESOME SALE!
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THIS IS A MUST SEE SALE!
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BEST PRICE'S ON THE NET!</A>

=======================================================================
A teacher asks an Arkansas redneck girl to use the word "handsome" in a
sentence.

She says, "When I'm suckin' dick and my jaw gets sore I use my handsome."
=====================================================================
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States , wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says.........

"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk."

"Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. "

With renewed hope they struggle up the nextsand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.

There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon ... every imaginable kind of cured pork.

"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree."

"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don't forget."

"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree."

And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 yards, with Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock.

Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath,

"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"

"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees it? "

"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree. Ees.....

Ees....

Ees....

Ees....

Ees a ham bush...."
=====================================================================
I always tried hard in school, but I did not do well in Biology....

In biology class, we were asked what are two things
commonly found in Cells...........

Apparently, Negroes and Mexicans was not a correct answer.
=====================================================================
An elderly couple were at home at the wife called out "So, when are
you going to the doctor"

"I told you, I'll go when I feel like going."

After 3 months of nagging, the old man finally walked into the
doctors office. "Doc," he said, "This is embarrassing, ut I'd like
to get a prescription for Viagra."

"Not a problem," said the doctor, as he started

"You don't understand," said the old man. "I am almost 90 years old
and I haven't had sex in more than ten years. I only want it to
stick out a little so when I pee, it doesn't get on my shoes."
=====================================================================
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in order to determine which work best for you. </a>
======================================================================
Senior Friend Finder
http://www.curlydavid.com/sfr.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/sfr.html">Senior Friend Finder</a>
======================================================================
I was out with family and friends at a local pub,
and I really stuck my foot in my mouth!

They had a contest going on at the pub and of
course we all joined in.
I was doing quite well, proud of being able to
answer all the questions.

I lost out on winning the pub quiz by one point.

The question was:

"Where do most women have curly hair?"

~

~

Apparently its Africa.
======================================================================
The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win, you're
still a rat.
======================================================================
"Adam," the heavenly voice called to the Garden of Eden,
"what did you and Eve do today?"
"We ate some fruit, Lord," Adam said reverently.
"Did you eat of the forbidden tree?" asked God.
"Yes, Lord, we did," Adam confessed.
"And then what did you do?" God asked.
"We made mad, passionate love all afternoon."
"Where is Eve now?" the Lord bellowed.
"She's down at the brook washing herself out."
"Oh, no," the Lord moaned." Now all my fish are going to smell like PUSSY!"
======================================================================
Mickey was in a bar having a drink, and the barmaid was one sexy
looking blonde lady!
He slapped a ten spot on the table and said, "I bet I can keep an
eye on this drink while I go to the bathroom."
She knew the bathroom was around the corner so she accepted the bet.
He took his glass eye out, placed it beside the drink and went to the
bathroom. "Bet you I can bite my own ear," Mickey challenged next.
The bet was accepted. He took out his false teeth & nipped his ear.
Once more he scooped up the money.
"Okay," he said, "I'll give you a chance to win your money back.
I bet I can make love to you so tenderly you won't feel a thing."
Now that was one thing she knew about, so she accepted the bet.
Mickey lifted her skirt & away they went.
"I can feel you." she giggled.
"Oh well," he grinned, "You win some, you lose some!!"
======================================================================
PICK YOUR PASSION
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======================================================================
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The Day!</a>
======================================================================
If you want to get your "15 Minutes Of Fame" send in a pic of yourself
(any pic will do) then sitback and wait for your 15 min of fame!
No pics of children this is an adult site!

Please send all pics to
curlydavid@yahoo.com or David@curlydavid.com
please put in the subject line "15 min of fame"

http://www.curlydavid.com/fame.html
<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/fame.html">"15 Minutes Of Fame" </a>
======================================================================
Curly's Object Of The Day!
Check it out everyday and try to guess the Next Object Of The Day!
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html">Curly's Object Of The Day</a>
======================================================================
ALL OF THE DAILY LINKS ARE NOW ON ONE PAGE!!

Babe,Stud,Hunk,Biker Babe,Oral Reports & ALL OF THE REST...
CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!
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======================================================================
Daily Ding Dong
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======================================================================
Surfer's Corner!

Car Flash
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======================================================================
In Deep
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======================================================================
Amateur Screw
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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Blonde Moments!

Did you hear about the blonde who got a Toy Poodle for her Birthday??
She Killed It Trying To Get The Batteries Up It's Ass!
======================================================================
A bleached blonde and a natural blonde were on top of the Empire
State Building..... How do you tell them apart?
The bleached blonde would never throw bread to the helicopters.
======================================================================
Curly's Classic Joke Of The Day!

Buckwheat and Darla were in school, and the teacher asks Darla: "How do
you spell 'dumb'?"
Darla says, "d-u-m-b, dumb."
The teacher says, "Very good, now use it in a sentence."
She says, "Buckwheat is dumb."
The teacher says, "Now spell 'stupid.'"
Darla says, "S-t-u-p-i-d, stupid."
The teacher says, "Very good, now use it in a sentence."
Darla says, "Buckwheat is stupid."
When the teacher calls on Buckwheat and says, "Buckwheat, spell
dictate."
Buckwheat stands and says, "D-i-c-t-a-t-e, dictate."
The teacher says, "Very good, now use it in a sentence."
Buckwheat ponders for a few seconds, then spurts out, "I may be dumb
and I may be stupid, but Darla says my dictate good!"
======================================================================
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======================================================================
In The Groove
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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Double Bubble
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In The Rain
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======================================================================

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Cameltoe
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Pool Time
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
Random Pages!

Hammock Pussy
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Thirsty
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Up View
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An Important Message
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/blind.html">An Important Message</a>

Are You Dirty Minded???
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English phrase - Chinese Interpretation
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Interpretation</a>

PENIS TAX
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Work Humor
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/7.html">Work Humor</a>

Funny Internet Pics
http://www.curlydavid.com/2.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/2.html">Funny Internet Pics</a>
=====================================================================
Flash Drives Loaded With Movies!
Just Plug It IN And Play!
Take It Anywhere You Go!
Pick The Flash Drive That You Like!
Loads To Choose From!
http://www.curlydavid.com/videostore/?open=flashdrive&f=1

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/videostore/?open=flashdrive&f=1">
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======================================================================
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in order to determine which work best for you. </a>
======================================================================
FUNNY ADULT T-SHIRTS
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/tees">FUNNY ADULT T-SHIRTS</a>
======================================================================
CHECKOUT THE DEMO VIDEO...A MUST SEE
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Simply select an orifice, a texture, and a case color to
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Over 224 combinations to choose from!
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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WE HAVE LOADS OF LEAD SINKERS!
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======================================================================
WEEKLY UPDATES
http://www.curlydavid.com/wupd.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/wupd.html">LAST WEEKS UPDATES</a>
======================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list">
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
======================================================================
1-888-786-5337-Call the Nice Older Lady of Your Dreams-1-888-786-5337
Call now for LIVE sensual, erotic phone fantasy action with the sexy
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Older and bolder ladies who will show true elder erotica phone sex
play.
1-888-786-5337
======================================================================
Remember - I don't write 'em ! And don't be offended, they're just JOKES!
Well that's all folks, keep on laughing!
Hope you all have a great day.
If you have any comments, jokes or suggestions please feel free to
email me at curlydavid@yahoo.com.
Please pass the word on to all of your friends to join CurlyDavid's
mailing list, where you get free jokes and more!.
To send in jokes curlydavid@yahoo.com
========================================================================

Curly David's Jokes #124

2010-05-05T13:53:21Z

This is an OPT-IN Mailing List.

If you no longer wish to receive these mailings, then please click
on the unsubscribe link at the bottom of this email.
=======================================================================
CurlyDavid Jokes - http://www.curlydavid.com
<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com">CurlyDavid Jokes</a>

This is an adult Joke mailing list,with MOSTLY ADULT MATERIAL .
This is meant for the 18+ audience.
And it is not meant to offend any one!!

Remember I don't write the jokes I just pass them around so we all can
have a few LAUGHS!! If you thought it was a different type of mailing
list or if you are easily offended by my jokes, then please unsubscribe!!
======================================================================
The mailer will go out 3 times a week!
THE JOKES ARE UPDATED EVERYDAY ON MY SITE!

Just a reminder if you missed a mailer or any updates then go directly
to my site and GET EVERYTHING THERE!!!
ALL NEW EVERYDAY!
http://www.curlydavid.com/joke.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/joke.html">THE DAILY JOKE PAGE</a>

ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!</A>
=======================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list">
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!</A>
=======================================================================

THIS IS A MUST SEE!
LOWEST PRICES ON THE INTERNET!

LAST LONGER PERFORM BETTER!
SATISFY YOUR LOVER!
CLICK HERE TO BUY GENERIC VIAGRA & CIALIS!
http://www.generic-pharmacy.net/?affid=7196

<a href="http://www.generic-pharmacy.net/?affid=7196">
CLICK HERE TO BUY GENERIC VIAGRA & CIALIS</a>

=======================================================================

DO YOU LIKE TO FISH?
WE HAVE LOADS OF LEAD SINKERS!
ALL SIZES AND SHAPES!
LOWEST PRICES AROUND CHEAPER THAN THE BAIT STORE!
WE SHIP ANYWHERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/bbsink.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/bbsink.html">
WE HAVE LOADS OF LEAD SINKERS!
ALL SIZES AND SHAPES!</a>

=======================================================================
She was only a computer programmer's daughter, and she was
a piece of user-friendly software who grabbed men's joysticks,
turned their floppies into hard drives, went down at the touch of
a button, was easy to enter, and let them come interface.
======================================================================
While shopping in a food store, two nuns happened to pass by the beer cooler.
One nun said to the other, "Wouldn't a nice cool beer or two taste wonderful on a hot summer evening?"
The second nun answered "Indeed it would Sister, but I wouldn't feel comfortable buying beer
as I am certain that it would cause a scene at the check-out counter."
"I can handle that without a problem" she replied as she picked up a six-pack and headed for the check-out.
The cashier had a surprised look on his face when the two nuns arrived with a six-pack of beer.
"We use beer for washing our hair" the nun said, "A shampoo, of sorts, if you will."
Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under the counter, pulled out a package of pretzel sticks and placed them in the bag with the beer.
He then looked the nun straight in the eye, smiled and said, "The curlers are on the house.
======================================================================
My small grandson got lost at the shopping mall..........
He approached a uniformed security guard and said,
"I've lost my grandpa!" The guard asked, "What's his name?" "Grandpa"
The guard smiled, then asked, "What's he like?"
The little tyke hesitated for a moment and then replied,
"Jack Daniels whiskey, and women with big boobs."
======================================================================
A country wife came home just in time to find her husband in bed with another woman. With super-human strength, borne of fury, and cutting firewood, lifting sacks of feed, and bales of hay, she dragged him down the stairs, out the back door, and into the barn.
She put his manhood in a vice and then secured it tightly and removed the handle. Next she picked up an old carpenter's saw.
The banged-up-cheater was terrified and hollered, "Stop! Stop! You're not gonna cut it off with that rusty saw, are you?"
The wife, with a gleam of revenge in her eye, put the saw in her husband's hand and said ...
"Nope....You are! I'm gonna burn down the Barn!"
======================================================================
A woman walks in a store to return a pair of eyeglasses that she had
purchased for her husband a week before. "What seems to be the problem,madam?"
"I'm returning these glasses I bought for my husband. He's still not
seeing things my way."
=====================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he
was God and I didn't.
======================================================================
People who live in glass houses should make love in the basement.
======================================================================
What do outhouses and candy have in common?
If there's no hole, it's not a lifesaver.
=======================================================================
A Mexican, a black man, and a white guy are in a bar having a drink
when a good-looking girl comes up to them and says " whoever can say
liver and cheese in a sentence can have me".

So the white guy says" I love liver and cheese".
She says "that's not good enough".

The black man says "I hate liver and cheese", and she says "that's
not creative",

And then the Mexican says "liver alone cheese mine".
======================================================================
SIGN ON POLISH CONTRACEPTIVE VENDING MACHINE
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======================================================================

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======================================================================
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======================================================================
If you want to get your "15 Minutes Of Fame" send in a pic of yourself
(any pic will do) then sitback and wait for your 15 min of fame!
No pics of children this is an adult site!

Please send all pics to
curlydavid@yahoo.com or David@curlydavid.com
please put in the subject line "15 min of fame"

http://www.curlydavid.com/fame.html
<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/fame.html">"15 Minutes Of Fame" </a>
======================================================================
Curly's Object Of The Day!
Check it out everyday and try to guess the Next Object Of The Day!
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
Daily Ding Dong
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======================================================================
Surfer's Corner!

Curly Fans
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======================================================================
I Love You
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
Sour Puss
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
Hello darling," breathed the obscene phone caller. "If you can
guess what's in my hand, I'll give you a piece of the action."

"Listen Dude," drawled the lil' Texas lady,
"If y'all can hold it in one hand, I ain't the least bit interested."
======================================================================
How can you tell if a man is horny?
He's breathing.

What's the useless skin around a penis called???
The MAN!
======================================================================
Curly's Classic Joke Of The Day!

A little girl and her mother walking through the park one day and
they accidentally saw two teenagers having sex on a bench. The little
girl said, "Mommy, what are they doing?" The mother hesitated, then
quickly replied, "Ummm... they are making cakes." Later that week,
they were at a zoo and the little girl saw two monkeys having sex.
Again she asked her mother what they were doing and her mother
replied with the same response, "Making cakes." The next day the
girl said to her mother, "Mommy, so you and Daddy were making cakes in
the basement last night, huh?" Shocked, the mother asked, "Why would you
think that ?" The girl replied ... "Because, this morning, I licked
some icing off the sofa."
======================================================================
COCK SWELLERS!
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======================================================================
Blow Me
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Feel The Hunger
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Amateur Screw
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
Home Run
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Why
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All In
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======================================================================

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======================================================================
Heated
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My Turn
http://www.curlydavid.com/myturn7.html

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Cum In Here
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======================================================================
WATERPROOF JACK RABBIT
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100% waterproof for fun in or out of the water.
The playful rabbit with its synchronized rotating metals beads and
reversing action has 3 speeds of vibration, 3 speeds of rotation,
and one touch activation. EZ load battery case.
The clear and blue variations have floating beads,
while the pink and purple have 5 rows of beads!
10" tall overall. 5" insertable length, 1 5/8" diameter
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WATERPROOF JACK RABBIT
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100% waterproof for fun in or out of the water. </a>
======================================================================
Floppers
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Which Hole
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Lucky Pussy
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No Balls
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Let's Flirt
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=====================================================================

DO YOU LIKE TO FISH?
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
CHECKOUT THE DEMO VIDEO...A MUST SEE
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Simply select an orifice, a texture, and a case color to
create your very own Fleshlight.
Over 224 combinations to choose from!
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/fleshli.html">will give you a
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======================================================================
Hollywood Collection
This Hollywood collection is packed with 6 sinfully-delicious
scenes from some of your favorite parodies, such as: The Da Vinci Load,
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======================================================================
WANT MORE PICS VIST MY SITE!
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
DO YOU LIKE TO FISH?
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======================================================================
WEEKLY UPDATES
http://www.curlydavid.com/wupd.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/wupd.html">LAST WEEKS UPDATES</a>
======================================================================
SUBSCRIBE AND UNSUBSCRIBE HERE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/cgi-bin/dada/mail.cgi/list/curly_list">
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======================================================================
1-888-786-5337-Call the Nice Older Lady of Your Dreams-1-888-786-5337
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======================================================================
Remember - I don't write 'em ! And don't be offended, they're just JOKES!
Well that's all folks, keep on laughing!
Hope you all have a great day.
If you have any comments, jokes or suggestions please feel free to
email me at curlydavid@yahoo.com.
Please pass the word on to all of your friends to join CurlyDavid's
mailing list, where you get free jokes and more!.
To send in jokes curlydavid@yahoo.com
========================================================================

Curly David's Jokes #120

2010-04-07T13:55:20Z

This is an OPT-IN Mailing List.

If you no longer wish to receive these mailings, then please click
on the unsubscribe link at the bottom of this email.
=======================================================================
CurlyDavid Jokes - http://www.curlydavid.com
<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com">CurlyDavid Jokes</a>

This is an adult Joke mailing list,with MOSTLY ADULT MATERIAL .
This is meant for the 18+ audience.
And it is not meant to offend any one!!

Remember I don't write the jokes I just pass them around so we all can
have a few LAUGHS!! If you thought it was a different type of mailing
list or if you are easily offended by my jokes, then please unsubscribe!!
======================================================================
The mailer will go out 3 times a week!
THE JOKES ARE UPDATED EVERYDAY ON MY SITE!

Just a reminder if you missed a mailer or any updates then go directly
to my site and GET EVERYTHING THERE!!!
ALL NEW EVERYDAY!
http://www.curlydavid.com/joke.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/joke.html">THE DAILY JOKE PAGE</a>

ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!
http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html

<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">ALL THE UPDATES AND MORE!</A>
=======================================================================

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=======================================================================

HAVE YOU SEEN THE TUBE VIDEOS ON CURLYDAVID.COM?
NEW VIDEOS ADDED DAILY!
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/index2.html">
HAVE YOU SEEN THE TUBE VIDEOS ON CURLYDAVID.COM?
NEW VIDEOS ADDED DAILY!</a>

=======================================================================
Why is marriage is like a violin?
After all the beautiful music is over, the strings are still attached.
======================================================================
An eighty-three year old lady finished her annual physical
examination whereupon the doctor said "You are in fine shape for your
age.. but tell me.. do you still have intercourse?"

"Just a minute .. I'll have to ask my husband," she said. She went
out to the reception room and said:

"Jake do we still have intercourse?"

Jake answered impatiently........"If I told you once I told you a
thousand times... We have blue cross !!"
======================================================================
Kevin , the blonde, said "I'm breaking up with Sherry!" ,
to his friend James .
" Are you crazy ? Sherry is a beautiful and smart woman!", said James.
Kevin responded..."Last night Sherry broke down and told me she was
bisexual, and who the hell wants to screw just twice a year ???"
======================================================================
Why don't Jewish mothers drink?
Alcohol interferes with their suffering.

Where does a Jewish husband hide money from his wife?
Under the vacuum cleaner.
======================================================================
WE HAVE OVER 20,000,000 MEMBERS AND WE GET MORE THEN 15,000 NEW SIGN
UPS EVERYDAY!
MEET NEW FRIENDS & SEX PARTNERS!
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<A HREF="http://www.curlydavid.com/afr.html">
MEET NEW FRIENDS & SEX PARTNERS!
ANONYMOUS EMAIL CHAT & INSTANT MESSAGING!
THOUSANDS OF PROFILES WITH SEXY PHOTOS!</a>
======================================================================
A woman went to a doctor claiming she had three vaginas!! The doctor
examined her and sure enough, she DID have three vaginas. He`d never
seen such a thing in all his years of medical practice. He told her
"I`ll stitch up two of them, but leave the middle one alone."
"Will that make me normal again?" she asked. "Of course." he said,
"This way, you won`t be screwed left, right and center!"
======================================================================
The teacher once asked the class to make a sentence with the phrase
pistol too.
Little Jimmy raised his hand, and after being recognized, said
"The lone Ranger tamed the wild west with his faithful indian companion
and his pistol too".
Very good says the teacher.
Little Johnnie raised his hand, and after being called on said
"Down at our house we make homebrew, drink till twelve and piss till two".
======================================================================
What's the difference between a blonde and a pot head?
A pothead stops being too stupid by not inhaling.
======================================================================
Around lunchtime Sheryl left school and headed for home, crying because
her first period had started and she had no idea what it was.
The girl's teacher was reluctant to get involved, so she suggested
Sheryl talk to her mom.
She was walking home when she ran into little Johnny.
"Why are you crying? Asked little Johnny.
"I'm crying because I'm bleeding," she replied.
"Give me a look," said little Johnny.
She lifted her skirt and showed him.
"Fuc*in' hell!" said little Johnny. "No wonder you're bleeding some
bastard's cut off your cock!"
======================================================================
Follow Curly on Twitter
http://twitter.com/curlydavid

<a href="http://twitter.com/curlydavid">Follow Curly on Twitter</a>
======================================================================
A blonde arrived for her first golf lesson and the pro asked her to
take a swing at a ball to see how she'd do.

The blonde did so and completely duffed the shot.

The pro said "Your swing is good but you're gripping the club too
hard grip the club gently as you would your husband's penis.".

The blonde took another shot and nailed the ball 275 yards
straight down the fairway.

The pro said "That was excellent!! Let's try it again, only this
time take the club out of your mouth."
======================================================================
$3.99 DVD SALE!
YOU CAN'T GO WRONG!
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======================================================================
YEAH I KNOW THE ECONOMY IS IN THE CRAPPER BUT WE STILL NEED TO HAVE FUN!
TREAT YOURSELF OR YOUR PARTNER TO A NEW TOY AND HAVE FUN!
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/videostore/?open=newsextoy_1&f=2">
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======================================================================
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======================================================================
Curly's Exhibitionist Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/exib.html">Curly's Exhibitionist Of
The Day!</a>
======================================================================
If you want to get your "15 Minutes Of Fame" send in a pic of yourself
(any pic will do) then sitback and wait for your 15 min of fame!
No pics of children this is an adult site!

Please send all pics to
curlydavid@yahoo.com or David@curlydavid.com
please put in the subject line "15 min of fame"

http://www.curlydavid.com/fame.html
<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/fame.html">"15 Minutes Of Fame" </a>
======================================================================
Curly's Object Of The Day!
Check it out everyday and try to guess the Next Object Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/obj.html">Curly's Object Of The Day</a>
======================================================================
ALL OF THE DAILY LINKS ARE NOW ON ONE PAGE!!

Babe,Stud,Hunk,Biker Babe,Oral Reports & ALL OF THE REST...
CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/dailysp.html">CURLY'S DAILY SPECIALS!</a>
======================================================================
Daily Ding Dong
http://www.curlydavid.com/ddong.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/ddong.html">Daily Ding Dong</a>

Snatch Of The Day!
http://www.curlydavid.com/snatch.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/snatch.html">Snatch Of The Day!</a>

SEND IN YOUR PICS TO BE THE "DAILY DING DONG" OR "SNATCH OF THE DAY"!
======================================================================
Surfer's Corner!

Mounds Of Joy
http://www.curlydavid.com/moj04.html

<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/moj04.html">Mounds Of Joy</a>
======================================================================
Up View
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<a href="http://www.curlydavid.com/upv68.html">Up View</a>
======================================================================
Up View
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======================================================================
Up View
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======================================================================
Amateur Screw
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======================================================================
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Blonde Moments!

A blonde went out to her mail box and looked in, closed the door and
went back in the house. A few minutes later she went out and looked in
the mail box again. She did this several times and her neighbor that was
watching her said, "You must be expecting a very important letter today
the way you keep looking into your mail box"...
The blonde answered "No", I am working on my computer and it keeps
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TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND

10. Cats' facial expressions
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds
7. Fat clothes
6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time
5. The difference between beige, off-white, and eggshell
4. Cutting your hair to make it grow
3. Eyelash curlers
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made
AND,
the Number One thing only women understand:
1. OTHER WOMEN
======================================================================
Curly's Classic Joke Of the Day!

The foreman at the lumberyard needed a replacement for an employee who
just quit; and while he wasn't eager to hire the blind man (because of
the obvious risks involved), the blind man begged for the chance.
"You'll see," he said. "Just put me in front of a pile of lumber. I
sniff the lumber and know what type it is -- I will stack it
accordingly."

So the foreman agreed to give it a shot. Positioning the blind man in
front of a stack of wood, he asked what type it was. Ahhhhhhhhhh..."
said the blind man, taking a deep breath. "Pine, twelve-foot," and
stacked it in place.

The foreman was surprised and repeated the test with oak and redwood,
fir and mahogany, but the blind man didn't miss once. Then, getting a
sly look on his face, the foreman called up to the office secretary.
"There's a blind man applying for a job and I don't want to hire him.
He says he can tell what kind of wood we have just by sniffing it. I
want to confuse him.. come back here, take off all your clothes and lay on
top of that pile of wood."

The secretary stripped naked and draped herself across the wood.
Sniffing furiously, the blind man then looked puzzled. "Gee, I don't
believe I've ever smelled wood like that before... let me take another
sniff."

He went closer and sniffed the wood again. "DAMN, I have no idea what
that is... can you turn it over?" The secretary turned over. The blind
man went near the pile of wood and took another deep sniff.

"Well?" the foreman asked. "What kind of wood is THAT?"

"Hmmm..." said the blind man, "I'm not sure, but near as I can tell,
it's the shit house door off a tuna boat."
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Remember - I don't write 'em ! And don't be offended, they're just JOKES!
Well that's all folks, keep on laughing!
Hope you all have a great day.
If you have any comments, jokes or suggestions please feel free to
email me at curlydavid@yahoo.com.
Please pass the word on to all of your friends to join CurlyDavid's
mailing list, where you get free jokes and more!.
To send in jokes curlydavid@yahoo.com
========================================================================